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Are we born with willpower, or do we learn it?

I've lost count of how many times I've spontaneously decided to give up things that are bad for me, then failed miserably.

Time after time I say I'll eat healthily and go to the gym doing a proper training program and I'll fall at the first (or second or third) hurdle. 

It's the same with smoking, chocolate, spending unnecessarily, getting up early - I could go on forever!

I'm having one of those moments of realisation. I start things, intending to finish them... I just never get as far as actually following it through.

So I'm sitting wondering: are we born with willpower, or is it learned? I think I knew the answer to my question before I asked it. You learn how to have willpower. But how?

How come I'm good at planning things but not following them through? What am I missing? 

If anyone has any advice or thoughts on this I'd love to hear about it. Any tips would be welcomed, I'll try anything! Well, I say I will. I'll probably plan it then not follow it through... Just kidding - I really want to learn! 

NC. X

I AM THOUGH!!! 

Routines

I have this thing where I seem to completely crumble when I haven't got a routine or a plan. 

I sometimes get really bad anxiety and it rears it's ugly head when I've got too much going on and I feel out of control.

In the past few months I've been working hard to get a promotion at my 9-5 job, put loads of pressure on myself while preparing for the interview, got the job, whilst simultaneously working 3-4 nights a week in a bar and having little time to live my life or have time for me. I've been poorly twice while this was going on too. Sob sob sob... that's enough negativity.

I've decided it's time to address my lifestyle, it's making me unhappy, anxious and I'm finding it difficult to hold it together.

There's a few things I want to do this year, so as long as I make time to do these things and have time for myself I'll be okay. Saturday is my designated day of stuff for me - I've just cut my shifts at my bar job so I only work 3-12 on a Saturday. But, this means I can have the majority of a day to do stuff for me, without being shattered from doing a double shift. OMG just talking about it is making me excited.

So far my list of stuff to do every Saturday is:

- go on my weekly run

- write a blog post

- read some of the book I'm reading at the time 

- check finances

If I manage to do all of these things every Saturday before I go to work, I will be so happy, hopefully less anxious.

Just some thoughts I was having on a early Sunday morning after finishing work. 

:)

Great North Run 2015

I just signed up to do the Great North Run again. I must be mad!

I did it last year and raised £300 for charity (North Tyneside Breast Cancer Support).

I started off with no running ability or experience, but managed to persevere and train enough to complete the half-marathon in unbelievably hot and humid weather exactly 2 hours and 30 minutes. By the way running when it's hot is really not fun :-(.

This year, I want it to be different. I want to do it for me and I want to do it in 1 hour and 45 mins. I'm actually really looking forward to running again. It helps me clear my head, release stress and gives me a buzz. I'm already thinking about my running playlists... I will share those when I make them!

I've got until September. 9 months. A whole pregnancy.

Best get cracking!